...Since you indicate that social anxiety seems to be a primary problem for you it would seem that working with a cognitive psychologist who could provide direction and structure regarding social situations would be a good idea. I'm thinking about a psychologist who would provide weekly homework assignments, very simple at first, so that you can begin to build your comfort in social situations. In my book I have at least one chapter devoted to this topic and you might want to stop by the library and take a look at it.
Socializing is a skill that all of us need to develop and, you're right, it doesn't come easily. I understand what you mean when you say you're fine but when you're about to meet new people you become anxious. That happens to a lot of people. You're also right that over analyzing just makes you feel worse and what you fear is happening probably isn't happening at all. I'm referring, of course, to thinking what people are thinking about you or what they might be saying war that you won't be able to hold your own in a conversation. Everything can be handled with the right type of guidance.
I think you should give therapy, specifically cognitive therapy aimed at social anxiety, another try....
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